Remember me kattie?

I don’t know if you will. nevertheless, this is my space and where else would I go and rant? you were the one who introduced the concept of going dutch with people. it was fun. fun like you would never have to owe anything to any one. we went through shit. you know it. i was there waiting for you to come out of your shell. you tried to be secretive, but i dint know that was just another part of every human. to me everything was sharing. i did. i expected others to do so. stupid me. you corrected me from who I was to who I should be. i only mean the outlook. you helped me change my cover, made me more presentable for others to take notice. but you were still you. judgemental. secretive. not willing to give always. but that’s just you. i dint know.

for all you could have just told me things straight. instead of ignoring and insulting. you were a attention seeker. well the entire world is. but i dint really think of you that way. you pushed me to a place, where i have never been before, and then i had to react the way i have never done. to dint give me a clear picture to view. nothing i could remember till date. you had your plans and i had my confusions.

those days will not be forgotten, cant be remembered for ever as well. because it looks like you have moved on. but still there. right there. and that is what is me. being me is not easy. but being you is very easy. just keeping walking. leaving trails or memories. never bothered about others. perceptive. that’s all i could say.

But its still good. now you have taught me another art of living. letting go. this time i realise that nothing lasts for ever. I’ve learnt to live through these times. I’ve learnt to value and and devalue. I’ve learn to unlearn and erase things. it must sound crazy to you. well.. most of things were crazy to you. one last thing you could have done is.. put a little more trust and patience on this. but what would you do? you were never that type. always rushing, jumping to conclusions and getting hurt unwanted.

it is ok girl. we have lived our times. now its a goodbye.

me being this kind, will let you go with this song.

Ain’t no sunshine..

Certain movies leave a everlasting impression on you, they leave you long for things that are not possible or a little impractical.  Especially this movie notting hill. it has hugh to just start out troubles and then it goes and on make it more complicated by this song.  Honestly, am I the only one to cry at the end of it??

  .

The movie version of the song  is this one :

post wedding blues.

it was not that bad. For once I got to agree with SM, he says I am quite imaginative at times. So the once the only Friends wedding reception was not bad at all! Right from the time I entered in to the hall, i fall 15 yrs back. All familiar face, very old people from the very good part of my life. Childhood. A LOT of people recognised me, I should say I am impressed. I wasn’t that bad a kid! :) people came up to me, hugged me, and expressed their shock over how grown I am. :P its a very nice feeling you get,  I relaxed around, chatted, laughed, gossiped. Shared information, obviously about the dogs, the kitten and the mama maamis of the old times.

I met my child hood prodigy, NOT as expected, but still fine,  she is not from India, was a very formal introduction, but still there was a spark. We laughed over some stupid self made jokes, in a very mature distant way. We even united in Facebook. Lets see where that takes us. Hey !she has an adorable daughter! :)

The encounter with the ‘friend’ (the groom’) wasn’t bad either. I went up the stage asking “do you even remember me?” for which the response was…

He :  Hey, Appu…! How are you? turns to the bride,  “we used to play together when we were kids“.

I was all smiles, giggling like a kid in the candy shop. Some how I found that extremely cute, they way he introduced me.

Chatted with him for a while, talked about his work, mind, life in all 10 secs or less. Took photos and walked down.

The main part : Food. Brilliant ! Considering the fact that I could never be unhappy with it!

Not bad at all !!

the WTF things

To TOP the charts is our own Alfie Patten, he wins the OSCARS with that FACE and THAT girl friend. I am looking for the right words to be used here. To start with I would like to thank my stars for not having been born in on of those ‘advanced, developed countries’ where every f**kin insane thing you do makes you look ‘cool’ and ‘in’.  One look at his pic (the one where he is feeding the baby) just kills me. I am losing hope on coming generations. Period !

Then this Frieda Pinto, there is no doubt that she looks very pretty and a very girl next door face; but seriously, opening shops in London and flaunting the prive of the Labels, for just a couple of minutes appearance in a movie is very ‘cinderella’ type. She is literally everywhere!! I am green with envy. I think that kid is hoggin more lime light than any of the new commers ever did.  How much she was paid for SDM anyways? Life changing experience they say!

Also, in Chennai, the Corporation is going nuts. They are excited and crunching their balls mad. They are going to build another freaking over bridge. This time, it is the VERY PRIME and VERY BUSY location ‘The Teynampet part of Anna Salai!! F**K! if anyone has ever travelled through the horrid “Doraisamy Subway’ while the over bridge on Usman Road was build, they would know what it means. (i.e) building a bridge in Chennai city means diverting the traffic to a different and the longest possible route, your destination may be just the next door but the travel time is going to be estimated as 45 f**king minutes.  And that is going to be a VERY happy news to the ‘Auto Rickshaws’ Arrrrrrrrrg !

I am going to be working from HOME, again!! Yes its a DejaVu, its happening again. I cant believe it BUT yes IT IS HAPPENING ! What the f**k ??!!

Corrected : There is a mistake on one of my WTF’s… or rather a lack of  clarity. The information about building a over bridge on the Teynampet is wrong, there seems to be something else going on there and that the reason is not clearly known for the Route Diversion.  Whatever !!

once the only friends wedding

.. is happening today, am not too sure if i should go. yeah i said friend.. but this is some 15yrs before. That was the last time I saw him, Yes its a Guy! The first and last guy I played with :) happily! We were a happy bunch, he, his brother and me and Oh, he has a cousin sister, I should say, she is the only reason I read or write English. My Nancy Drew / Archies, Hardy Boys, Barbie tutor.

I am confused. Like always. Don’t know if I should really go. His mom is a very close friend of our family, like wise the entire family. But I have lost touch of those guys or their sister. Lost touch? I have never been in touch. It is one of those things you lose once you start getting pimples on your face or once people start staring at your front. Those things grow and these friendships fade away. I grew up and stopped playing with them. :P I know how it sounds ! Silly !

Now after 15+yrs, I get his wedding invitation. His mom called me and called me buy a name only VERY few and a very close friends or relatives of mine know. I had even forgotten that I had a ridiculous name like that! Thanks God. Nostalgic! She invited me over phone and sent a card and made some sweet orders to get my huge behind to the wedding. So I am all ready, dressed, but still not made up my mind if I should go.  Firstly I am really shy yes i said that… i am blusing…! I am going to meet him after a very long time. The last time he saw me was when, both of us dint bother that our undergarments were showing out, well, we were too busy building Lego castles and trying to put some cars and and stuff into the house we build.  So I dont know how he would react. Hell I dont even know if he would remember me! Imagine.. 

ME : “Hey Hi!, Happy Married life”

HE : Ummm, huh… “Thank You, but I am sorry do we know each other??”

and that is not it, I am dragging SM along with me. So ..  the kind of sales pitch I gave to convince him to accompany me is not going to be very pleasant, if  THAT BOY is gonna react like that. But that not even the issue! The thing is  there are a whole bunch of people who know me well there.. Err.. I guess that is  THE issue.. I am seeing them after a long arse time. So kind of apprehensive like a first time Date. Shit !  I am actually kind of excited too.. !