I am responsible for everything I say, but how can I be held for some assumptions that arise out of what I say? When I say ‘I MEAN’ and the other understand that as ‘I am Mean’ which translates as “she is mean” when she tells some one else? How am I supposed to be answerable?? I write to lament, I write for the freedom it provides to vent out my feelings, I feel clotted when I don’t and I hate that feeling, I write when I am happy, sad, rude, disappointed. The sole purpose of this page is let out my feelings, my hurt, my happiness, and my tears but other than that I am not responsible for the way people feel when they read it? I mean that does not make any effing sense!! As a person I am very very conscious of what people think about me, well…. I would say that every one is! I used to think twice even before wearing loud colors. Its not the same now, I’ve changed and it is for good. If I am hurt; either if I say its because of someone’s behavior, or my misunderstanding of their actions, I AM HURT period, there is not other way I could feel about it, and then I write, I spit it out, it is momentary, its like till you feel the pain and then it fades away, but the memories remain, the wound leaves a scar. How much ever you try to forget you can’t.
I am very rude in writing; I’ve seen it, something which I would change in the coming posts. Nevertheless, I have the reason to be so! Moreover I can’t be explaining it to everyone, WTF? IF you are not able to rationalize things in your head about certain things weather it is good or not, I cannot help it. You bloody can’t hold me responsible for that!! I would say… holding me guilty for something like this is absolutely baseless and idiotic. Can I assume that you are taking it to your convenience to hold it against me (makes me think that you were just waiting for a reason)???
Not to worry, I have grown, from a girl to an adult; I am strong to handle stuff. I will cry but when I am done, I rub my cheek and take my chin high and walk in front of people intact! But it would be YOU who would end up feeling nonsense about something completely silly! I would want to help, but I am sorry I so can’t
